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23: Is Misery Holding You Back from Transforming Your Life?

Apr 11, 2019

What is holding you back from transforming your life? On this episode, we are focusing on misery. They say that misery loves company. We want to teach you how to break free from the chains of those that surround you and strive for more. You’ll learn what creates misery, why those you love may be keeping you in misery, and how to focus on what you really want. Listen to this episode to learn how to keep misery from holding you back from your goals.

Outline of This Episode

  • [2:22] Misery loves company
  • [7:44] What creates misery?
  • [12:11] Misery also comes from focusing on what you don’t have
  • [15:26] What happens when you focus on what you do want?
  • [21:29] Focus on what you have by practicing gratitude

Misery loves company

Is your environment causing you misery? Are you trying to transform your life only to find that those around you are holding you back? Often when you try to escape your current situation the crowd around you will try to pull you back down. It’s important to realize that the only people that are holding you back are the others in the pit around you. They want you to stay in their zone of comfort. Others who you are striving to be more like will not criticize you for trying to achieve what they already have. The entrepreneur will not criticize you for starting a business. The fit person won’t criticize you for going to the gym. The wealthy person admires you trying to build your own wealth.

What creates misery?

Misery has 3 root causes that are holding you back.

  1. Misery comes when you focus on what you don’t want. Don’t focus on what you don’t want in your life. When you focus on what you don’t want you will actually see more of that thing in your life.
  2. Misery comes when you focus on what you don’t have. We often focus on what others have that we don’t. Comparison is the thief of joy. It robs you of every bit of positivity.
  3. Misery comes when you focus on what you don’t like. Do you find yourself complaining a lot? Everyone needs to vent sometimes, but it is important to recognize that's what you are doing and that it is bringing you down.

What happens when you focus on what you do want?

If you find yourself focusing too much on what you don’t want instead find what you are grateful for. When you focus on what you are grateful for more of that goodness will come your way. It is often much easier for people to focus on what they don’t want than to try and figure out exactly what they do want. Once you know what you don’t want, try flipping it around and striving for the opposite. Find clarity in what you do want. For instance, if you are worried about your debt rather than focusing on not wanting the debt in your life try to focus on building wealth instead.

Are your negative habits holding you back?

We all complain sometimes and we can get into a funk and wallow in our own misery. Instead of complaining day in and day out give yourself a time limit. Allow yourself to blow off steam for a day and then move forward. If you find yourself fearful, envious or complaining think about how you can change your habits. We all have these subtle and automatic habits. You won’t be able to change them overnight but the more you are aware of your negative habits the more you will be able to recognize them and change them. Don’t allow your miserable habits to keep holding you back any longer.

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